All me, by me

Strangest dream last night but it actually was almost like someone sending me a message….here it goes…

So pattie was in my dream again for the first time in a long time. She called my cell multiple times and i would not answer until she called my house cause it must be urgent. She told me to meet her cause she needed to tell me something. She told me she was just on a cruise ship and something broke off the ship and flew back and sliced her open in two spots, the center of her hand and forehead. And then she fell off the ship. She wanted to tell me not to worry about her cause she survived and is doing good. It was strange but anyways i then told her something that ive never even thought of before…”living life to its fullest doesnt mean just living everyday like its your last..it means being able to say at the end of everyday that you are geniunely happy with your life and actions, have no regrets and have surrounded yourself with the people you love.”

And that was the dream. Dont know what it means but the things I said are something i will learn to live be and you should too

I still wish you never existed. I wish i never loved you.

Dont tweet about me. I dont need people texting me and asking me whats going on. GOOO AWAYYYY

Last night i felt something i havent in a long time, the chills. You touched my face and kissed my lips and my whole body was instantly covered with the chills. I feel myself falling for you, im terrified but i feel so safe in your arms. The 3 words that im afraid of now almost slipped from my mouth last night. Idk what it is but you got me. “forever is a long time but i wouldnt mind spening it by your side”

god..will it ever end?..yes it will cause i am stopping this for good. Just LEAVE ME ALONE. Mark my words, you will never be even a thought in my life ever again. I want nothing to do with you. You do nothing but bring out a monster in me. Stay far away, its for the best like you said. 

bgiuyfjtycderxtcfyguvbihonjpmuytfaerw. so.annoyed.

goodnight…oh and goodbye sweetheart, never come back, youre no longer welcome in my heart. 

(Source: another-night-awake)

is that what you call a get away? tell me what you got away with, ive seen more spine in a jellyfish, seen more guts in eleven year old kids…so have another drink and drive yourself home. I hope theres ice on all the roads so you can think of me when you forget your seat belt and again when your head goes through the windshield